Something’s Gotta Give

I knew this day would come. A day that when the ‘rubber meets the road’ where my doctoral research goes from theory to practice. Where I actually need to take ACTION. Milestones. Product.

Firstly having a scholarship to do the doctoral program has been awesome. How many chances in life do you get to do a higher education degree fully funded?  I think reality sets in after 3 years of initial research and foundation. It’s regretful but prudent that I withdrew from the doctoral program today, but I have 3 years to rejoin. Its a pretty big disappointment for me. I know I can still do this but there is a tipping point between ‘work’ – I LOVE my job, family and study. Lately Ive found these lines so blurred where Ive been working at the laptop at home then looking up at the clock to find its nearly 1am. Busy has been the boss of me (thanks @mauimickey). Teachers are like that I guess, Im nothing special.

This post is more of a cathartic rant about how I want to complete my doctoral studies, the struggles I went though so far.. but it also highlights how ‘immature’ I am to actually complete it. I need more reading and more interaction in an academic community.  It may have been naive of me to think that I could do this on my own (and yes Im al about PLNs etc and have such a great one)  but can this study be done in more of less isolation? I loved the challenges. Have had many along the way  and called on the folks I know to help out and got through them. However, when I get into the academic community I am so very humbled at how much I dont know and that’s ok. Its what Im here for. To learn.

Next step? Well, I still have 3 years to join back in, to work on the research behind the scenes. To do the best I can at my school now to support student learning.

Keep learning.